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It has been three years since I have had time or felt like writing in this blog.  The last three years have been a bit touchy.

The therapy continued

We have written and published four books starting with the memoir, Foreign Service Family Style, followed by three thriller novels.  The memoir was written as therapy which worked very well.  My husband now had something to occupy his mind and recall many of the memories that were deep in the recesses of his mind. 

These memories were the fuel to flesh out the characters, their thoughts and actions.  He worked in many of the locations, but when the actions went to foreign countries, he searched the computer for hours gathering information on cities, street names, weather reports, and political history.

 He was now off the couch, and his nose was out of the book.  However, now he asked me for help writing his book.  He could search the computer for information, develop the storyline, characters and their actions, but needed help navigating the computer programs.  This drew me away from my art study. 

I got involved in writing

The more I helped him, the more I became interested in what he was writing and would make suggestions: show the reader how the character feels, she wouldn’t dress that way, don’t keep repeating the same action, that is the wrong word to use there.

I suppose my questions and suggestions tore away at his self-esteem, and he would bite back at me, and I would retreat to my art table.  However, in a day or two, he would come asking for help.

Another side of the PTSD?

I think for the last three years I have seen another side of the PTSD or was it the aging process.  He no longer played golf because of pains in his knees.  That reduced his friendships outside the house.  He seemed to have no other interest except writing and when I made suggestions and questioned something, it just tore away at his ego.  He was no longer the Narc who chased druggies, but he could sure do it on paper.  Was I undermining that, or was he angry at himself for aging?